Monday, March 06, 2006

The perils of being green.

Today, Peter took me to see the movie "Walk the Line" which we both enjoyed. The story of Johnny Cash and June Carter Cash. I can really recommend this film.

Unfortunately for me, Peter is leaving tomorrow, but I have really enjoyed his visit. He has helped me work out quite a few things on the computer.

It’s not easy being green.

A lady from the Blue Mountains, N.S.W, who was a tree hugger and an anti-hunter, purchased a piece of rural land. There was a large gum tree in the top paddock. She wanted a good view of the natural splendour around her so she started to climb the old tree.

As she neared the top she encountered a tawny frogmouth owl that flew at her. In her haste to escape the lady slid down the tree and got many splinters in her private parts. In serious pain she hurried to the nearest doctor. She told him that she was an environmentalist and an anti-hunter and just how she came to get the splinters.

The Doctor listened to her story with great patience and then told her to go into the waiting room and he would see if he could help her. She sat and waited for three hours before the doctor re-appeared.

The angry lady demanded ”What took so long?"

He smiled and then said ”Well, I had to get permits from the Environmental Protection Agency, Land Care and the Conservation Department before I could remove old growth timber from a recreational area. I'm sorry, but they turned me down.

TAKE TIME TO READ THESE ITS VERY INTERESTING.

In the 1400s a law was set forth that a man was not allowed to beat his wife with a stick any thicker than his thumb.

Hence we have "the rule of thumb".

Many years ago in Scotland, a new game was invented. It was ruled "Gentlemen Only... Ladies Forbidden"...

and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.

The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were Fred and Wilma Flintstone

Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the US Treasury.

Men can read smaller print than women can but women can hear better.

Coca-Cola was originally green.

It is impossible to lick your elbow.

The average number of people airborne over the US any given hour: 61,000

Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.

The first novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer.

Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history: Spades - King David

Hearts – Charlemagne

Clubs -Alexander, the Great

Diamonds - Julius Caesar.

111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321

Check it out!!

If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle.

If the horse has one front leg inthe air the person died as a result of wounds received in battle.

If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.

Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go until you would find the letter "A"?

A. One thousand

Q. What do bullet-proof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers all have in common?

A. All invented by women.

Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil?

A. Honey

In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase: "Goodnight, sleep tight."

It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink.

Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month, which we know today as the honeymoon.

In English pubs, ale was traditionally ordered by pints and quarts...

So in old England, when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them Mind your pints and quarts, and settle down." It's where we get the phrase "mind your P's and Q's" Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim, or handle, of their ceramic cups.

When they needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service. "Wet your whistle" is the phrase inspired by this practice.

And Finally.

At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow

2 comments:

Karen said...

Those were great! Thanks for the giggles.

I'm waiting for my DVD of Walk the Line to arrive in the mail, I'm anxious to see it.

The photo of you and Peter is fun! Sorry I haven't been around much. I hope you all are having a great time.

kenju said...

I'm not one of that 75%, Merle, because I already tried it before...LOL