Sunday, February 12, 2006

JOB OPPORTUNITY

An office manager was given the task of hiring an individual to fill a job opening. After sorting through a stack of resumes he found four people who were equally qualified. He decided to call the four in and ask only one question. Their answer would determine which of them would get the job. The day came and as the four sat around the conference room table the interviewer asked: “What is the fastest thing you know of?” Acknowledging the first man on his right, the man replied, “ A THOUGHT. It just pops into your head. There’s no warning that it’s on the way; it’s just there. A thought is the fastest thing I know of.” “That’s very good!” replied the interviewer. ”And now you sir?” he asked the second man. “Hmm…let me see. A BLINK is the fastest thing I know of.” “Excellent!” said the interviewer. “The blink of an eye is a very popular cliché for speed.” He then turned to the third man who was contemplating his reply. “Well, out at my Dad’s ranch, you step out of the house and on the wall there’s a light switch. When you flip that switch, way across the pasture the light comes on in less than an instant in the barn. TURNING ON A LIGHT is the fastest thing I can tink of.” The interviewer was very impressed with the third answer and thought he had found his man. “It’s hard to beat the speed of light” he said. Turning to the fourth man, the interviewer and posed the same question. “It’s obvious to me that the fastest thing known is DIARRHOEA.” “What?” said the interviewer, stunned by the response. “Oh I can explain,” said the fourth man, “You see the other day I wasn’t feeling so good and I ran for the bathroom. But before I could THINK, BLINK, or TURN ON THE LIGHT, I had already shit my pants!” He got the job………… I do not usually say rude words, but the joke needed it. John also found this one. He and has girlfriend and her son went fishing in the Murray River in his boat. No fish, only a few bites. BUT a man was water-sking on the Murray and went into the bank and was killed. John and Co were not near the accident, thank goodness. I was glad to get a phone call to say they were home. My other son, Geoff and his wife Joanne came up for the afternoon. We had our lunch and chatted for awhile. Then Geoff spent a lot of time and energy weeding my garden and planting some plants for me. Jobs that I cannot do myself, so it is much appreciated, and he will not accept any money for doing it. He and Jo live on the outskirts of Melbourne, and it takes just over two hours to get here.They have a lovely home ~ a double storied house. ( I am not sure if storied is a word ~ but if not, why not? If MrEddie can make up words, so can I.) I will put a photo on when Peter visits and shows me how. That’s it for tonight. Have a great week ahead.

3 comments:

LZ Blogger said...

Merle ~ Sometimes without rhe rude words, it just doesn't have the same impact. I thought it was FUNNY! By the way was that MY job interview? ~ jb///

mreddie said...

Exactly, why not make up words, even if you are the only one that knows the meaning, that's the fun of it. ec

Peter said...

You are branching out Merle, swearin' on the blog, you'll have to wash your mouth out with chocolate!!!
You could describe Geoffs house as the floor you get to see and the other one on top of it.