Friday, April 07, 2006

Dining Out.

Shepparton Story again. The Victorian mother of the year lives in Shepparton. She was chosen for this position just yesterday.

She has six children, all adults now, and has fostered many children with disabilities for many years.

Last year she donated a kidney to one of her sons, who needed it.

Sounds like a very giving lady, representing our state of Victoria.

<><><><><> A joke for you:

A man is dining in a fancy restaurant and there is a gorgeous redhead sitting at the next table. He has been checking her out since he sat down, but lacks the nerve to talk with her.

Suddenly she sneezes, and her glass eye comes flying out of its socket towards the man. He reflexively reaches out, grabs it out of the air, and hands it back. Oh my, I am so sorry, " the woman says as she pops her eye back in place. "Let me buy your dinner to make it up to you, " she says.

They enjoy a wonderful dinner together, and afterwards they go to the theater followed by drinks. They talk, they laugh, she shares her deepest dreams and he shares his. She listens.

After paying for everything, she asks him if he would like to come to her place for a nightcap and stay for breakfast. They had a wonderful, wonderful time.

The next morning, she cooks a gourmet meal with all the trimmings. The guy is amazed! ! Everything had been SO incredible! !! !

"You know, " he said, "you are the perfect woman. Are you this nice to every guy you meet? " "No, " she replies. . . . . "

Wait for it.

It's coming.

The suspense is killing you, isn't it?

She says: "You just happened to catch my 'eye'.

<><><><><><>

Two little old ladies were sitting on a park bench outside

the local town hall where a flower show was in progress.

The thin one leaned over and said: “Life is so darned boring.

We never have any fun any more.”

For $5, the first old lady slowly fumbled her way out of her

clothes and, completely naked, streaked, as fast as an old lady

could through the front door of the flower show.

Waiting outside, her friend soon heard a huge commotion inside

the hall, followed by loud applause and shrill whistling.

The smiling and naked old lady came through the exit door

surrounded by a cheering crowd.

“What happened?” asked her waiting friend.

“I won first prize as Best Dried Arrangement.”

<><><><><><><><>

Fred was standing at his front gate when Dave drove up in the

garbage collection truck.

“Hey, Fred,” shouted Dave, “Where’s ya bin?”

“I’ve bin on holidays, Dave,” Fred replied.

“No, Fred, where’s ya wheelie bin?” asked Dave.

“Oh, I’ve weally bin in jail,” Fred sighed.

<><><><><><><>

Have a great weekend folks.

<><><><><><>

8 comments:

Jacqui said...

Love your post, the story and the jokes.

I dont mind the leaves, at least they only fall once a year, not like the gums who drop leaves and gumnuts the whole year, and are mostly pretty boring to look at.

Have taken some photos around the house will post some soon, luv jacqui

bornfool said...

Thanks for the chuckles this morning. Have a great weekend, Merle!

Granny said...

Good morning Merle, at least here.

Peter said...

Hi Merle, another week down, they fly past don't they.

Ms. Vickie said...

Thanks for the chuckles it is always nice to share chuckles
with others. Hope you have a great weekend and life is treating
you well. I always appreciate your kind comments at my place.
Thanks for being a kind and special lady.

JunieRose2005 said...

Merle,


You always find the good ones!! :)

Thanks,

June

SJ said...

What a wonderful person this year's Victorian Mother sounds like.

Ouch I din't the "catch my eye" coming. LOL.


You have a great weekend too.

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