Saturday, April 08, 2006

Maturity Check.

Hi Folks ~~ Well my weekend is half over. But after my

evening meal I will watch my football team play. Probably

wont win, but one never knows. Live in hope!!

I found the following article in a free local paper and thought

it may interest some of you.

25 Ways to tell if you have finally grown up.

1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can’t smoke any of them.

2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.

3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.

4. 6 am is when you get up, not when you go to bed.

5. You hear your favorite song in an elevator.

6. You watch the Weather Channel.

7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of “hook up”

and “break up.”

8. You go from 130 days of holiday time to 20.

9. Jeans and a jumper no longer qualify as “dressed up.”

10. You’re the one calling the police because the kids next

door won’t turn down the stereo.

11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around

you.

12. You don’t know what time Taco Bill closes anymore.

13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.

14. You feed your dog/cat Science Diet instead of McDonald’s

leftovers.

15. Sleeping on the couch makes our back hurt.

16. You take naps from noon to 6 pm.

17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the

beginning of one.

18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 am would severely

upset, rather than settle your stomach.

19. If you’re a girl, you go to the chemist for Ibrufen and

antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.

20. A $4 bottle of wine is no longer “pretty good stuff.”

21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.

22. “I just can’t drink the way I used to….” replaces

“I’m never going to drink that much again.”

23. 90 oer cent of the time you spend in front of a computer

is for real work.

24. When you find out your friend is pregnant you

congratulate her instead of asking “What happened?”

25. You read this entire list looking desparately for one sign

that doesn’t apply to you and can’t find one to save your

sorry old butt.

<><><><><><><><>

A woman was sitting at a bar enjoying an after work cocktail

with her girlfriends when an exceptionally tall, handsome,

extremely sexy middle aged man entered.

<><>

He was so striking that the woman could not take her eyes off

him. The young- at- heart man noticed her overly attentive

stare and walked directly toward her. (As all men will.)

<><><>

Before she could offer her apologies for so rudely staring, he

leaned over and whispered to her, “I’ll do anything, absolutely

anything, that you want me to do, no matter how kinky, for $20

on one condition.” (There are always conditions.)

<><><><>

Flabbergasted, the woman ased what the condition was. The man replied, “You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three wods.” (Controlling huh?)

<><><><><>

The woman considered his proposition for a moment, then

slowly removed a $20 bill from her purse, which she pressed

into the man’s hand along with her address.

<><><><><><>

She looked deeply into his eyes, and slowly, and meaningfully

said…….. “Clean my house.”

<><><><><><><><> Take care folks. <><<><><><><><>

15 comments:

kenju said...

I sure can relate to the one about sleeping on the couch!

Merle, congrats on giving up smoking after so many years. I only smoked for 23 years - but now I am paying the price for it!

Granny said...

If I can get my links to work, I'm stealing your list for granny.

Hope you're enjoying your weekend. Mine just began of course.

JunieRose2005 said...

LOL


That last joke was very good!


June

mreddie said...

OK - now I know for sure that I have finally grown up - several years ago. :) ec

Jacqui said...

Hi Merle, I must congratulate you,too, on your quitting smoking, having been married to three smokers, I know how hard it can be. You would think I would have learned something by now, but Walter told me he did not smoke when we met. I didn't know that he had been a smoker, and like so many others would get hooked again.

Thanks for your encouragement to me, I really appreciate it. luv jacqui

Jacqui said...

HI Merle, I left a comment on your Dining Out post. I have just checked the time and I have been sitting here for nearly three hours, where can I get a clock like yours. I have been getting up an hour earlier so I could spend that time blogging, but it's not working too well. luv jacqui

Sometimes Saintly Nick said...

It seems that I have NOT yet grown up! Thank God////////////////////////////////////////////

Sometimes Saintly Nick said...

The interesting format of my comment above is the result of Alex my cat stepping on my keyboard just as I clicked “Log In and Publish.”

LZ Blogger said...

Merle ~ I thought I WAS mature, until I got to number 2. ANY bed works for me! ~ jb///

Ms. Vickie said...

Congratulations on giving up smoking, that was not easy I am certain.

I love the smilies and I am not grown up yet and I think I will just stay this way. :)

Peter said...

Happy early birthday, I've given you a site counter, its all Blue like your footy team, and as it seemed a bit unfair to start you off at zero I gave you 2000 hits as well, no idea how accurate that is of course, but who cares.

Meow said...

I don't think I will ever grow up ... don't want to, anyway !!
Take care, Meow

Janice said...

Hi,

Very funny on the joke, but I said yes to wasy to many of the things on your list!

Yes, I am getting old!

Janice~

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