Rainy Monday

Hi all ~~ It has been a lovely rainy Monday here today.

So apart from doing some washing and the necessary

chores, I have had time to catch up with friends and

to do some reading. Shopping day tomorrow, so I will

have to write out my list later. I enjoy this outing once

every fortnight.

A few Laws of the Universe……..

Law of Mechanical Repair:

After your hands become coated wit grease, your nose

will begin to itch or you’ll have to pee.

Law of Workshop:

Any tool when dropped, will roll to the least accessible

corner.

Law of Probility:

The probability of being watched is directly proportional

to the stupidity of the act.

Law of Telephone:

When you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.

Law of the alibi:

If you tell the boss a flat tyre made you late for work, the

very next morning you will have a flat tyre.

Variation Law:

If you change traffic lanes, the one you were in will start to

move faster than the one you are in now.

Bath Theorem:

When the body is fully immersed in water, the phone rings.

Law of the Result:

When you try to prove to someone that a machine won’t work,

it will.

Theatre Rule:

At any event, people with seats furthest from the aisle, arrive

last.

Law of Logical Argument:

Anything is possible if you don’t know what you’re talking about.

Wilson’s Law:

As soon as you find a product you really like,they will stop

making it.

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A group of kids was trying very hard to make the move from

kindie to school.

The biggest hurdle the kids faced was that the teacher insisted on “no baby talk.”

You need to use “big people” words, she was always reminding

them.

She asked Chris what he had done over the weekend.

“I went to visit my Nana,” the little tyke answered.

“No, you went to visit your grandmother,” the teacher corrected. “Use ‘big people words”.

She then asked Olivia what she had done. “I took a ride on a

choo-choo, she told her.

“No you took a ride on a train,” the teacher said. “You must

remember to use ‘big people’ words.”

She then asked little Alan what he had done.

“I read a book,” he replied.

“That’s wonderful,” the teacher said. “What book did you read?”

Alan thought really hard about it, then puffed out his chest

with great pride and said:

“Winnie the S@#t.”

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