Tuesday, August 15, 2006

It's All Very Funny

Hello to you all ~~ I hope everything is going

well at your place. Today I went to my 3 monthly

check up after having blood tests last week, and

I am happy to say that all is well. Thanks Doc !!

Then my son called in after being away for a long

weekend motor-cycle trip to Clare in Sth.Australia

which he enjoyed and showed me lots of photos.

He did just over 2,000 kilometres in 5 days.

<><><><>

<><><> IT’S ALL VERY FUNNY. <><><>

It’s rather strange that shoes have tongues

But never seem to talk;

And though a chair has four strong legs,

I’ve never seen one walk.

And have you heard a dog-fish growl?

Or a dandelion roar?

Or seen a tiger-lily prowl

Or a cat-fish miaow before?

I think a window must be sad,

For it always has a pane,

And are crossroads always grumpy?

And can a sugar-cane?

Although my legs have two fine calves,

I’ve never heard them moo,

Nor heard the bark upon a tree

Go “bow-wow-wow” – have you?

An elephant can swing his trunk,

But have you seen him pack it?

And would a whiting be a whiting

Should you ever chance to black it?

A river always has a bank,

But never any money. . . .

Oh dear, oh dear, it’s all so queer

That things should be so funny.

<><><><><>

Where in the company do you belong?

Take the prospective employees you are trying

to place and put them in a room with only a table

and two chairs. Leave them alone for 2 hours,

without any instruction. At the end of that time

go back and see what they are doing.

<><><><>

IF they have taken the table apart, put them in

Engineering.

IF they are counting the butts in the ashtray,

assign them to Finance.

IF they are waving their arms about and talking

loud, send them to Consulting.

IF they are talking to the chairs, Personnel is a

good spot for them.

IF they are wearing green sunglasses and need a

haircut, Computer Information Systems is their

niche.

IF the room has a sweaty odor, perhaps they are

destined for the Help Desk.

IF they mention what a good price we got for the

table and chairs, put them into Purchasing.

IF they mention that hardwood furniture does not

come from rainforests, Public Relations for them.

IF they are sleeping, they are Management material.

IF they are writing up the experience, send them to

the Technical Documents team.

IF they don’t even look up when you enter the room,

assign them to Security.

IF they try to tell you it’s not as bad as it looks, send

them to Marketing. <><><>

<<< style=""> A JOKE CALLED THE TEAPOT>>>

George was fixing the front door and he found

that he needed a new hinge, so he sent his wife

Louise to the hardwear store.

At the hardware store Louise saw a beautiful

teapot on a top shelf while she was waiting for

Henry, the manager, to finish waiting on another

customer. When he was finished, Louise asked

“How much for the teapot?”

<><>

Henry replied. “That’s real silver and it is $500.”

<><>

“My goodness, that sure is a lot of money!” Louise

exclaimed. Then she proceeded to describe the

hinge that George wanted. Henry went to the back

room to find it.

<><>

From the back room Henry yelled, “Louise do you

wanna screw for that hinge?”

<><>

Louise hollered back, “Well, no. . . but I will for that

teapot !!”

<><><> Let’s finish on a nicer note <><><>

If I have brought a gleam of light

To cheer a darkened day,

If I held out a friendly hand

To help along the way.

Then in these acts of kindness done

It is not me you see,

But glimpses of that Loving One

Who chose to dwell in me.

<><> Bye for now, Take care Merle. <><>

21 comments:

Sue said...

Thanks for the day brighteners! Glad all went well with your blood work and Dr. visit.
((hugs))

kenju said...

Cute poem, Merle. It points out the idiosyncracies of our language!

Karen said...

Great news about your tests, here's to the next tests being great too. :-)

Thanks for the giggles. Have a great day! :-D Love & hugs!

Tammy said...

Hey Miz Merle...I just got back from the doc too...I got a good report for a change!!!
(also had to have some bloodwork...ouchie!!)
:-D

jel said...

Glad you had a good Checkup,

and Love the post!


oh Did you know that today was Jon's birthday! Aug 15 ?

have a great day!

Clare said...

Glad your bloodwork went okay Merle and great jokes as usual :).

PEA said...

Oh, Merle, we need more people like you in this world who brings us laughter!! Glad everything went well at the doctor's and that all your results came in fine:-) xoxo

Peter said...

Hi Merle, there has been lots of posts at "Granny's" since the 6th, try a refresh by clicking august in her archives that may get the latest pages.

Abandoned in Pasadena said...

So glad that your visit to the doctor went well. Jimmy & I also ride a motorcycle and we agree that 2,000 kilometres in 5 days is a lot of riding. Merle, I have my own motorcycle and Jimmy is teaching me to ride it by myself. So far I am doing very well.

Every day as I come over to read your jokes and inspirational messages and poems, I wonder how in the world you come up with something new each day. For as long as I have been reading your posts, I have not seen you duplicate anything.

You're a wonderful person Merle and you make the world laugh everyday.

Your friend,
Sandy :)

rhapsody said...

Oooo- I commented but it disappeared!

Well, I'm glad that your visit to the doctor went well-

& love the jokes as usual, Merle- the teapot was a good one!

Puss-in-Boots said...

Glad your visit to the doctor was a positive one! Love the joke about the teapot,too and the puns. Apparently English is the hardest language for non-English speaking people to learn. We can see why!

Hope you have a great day, Merle, and thank you for coming over to my place with your comments, it's as if I have met you face to face. I like it.

Blessings and hugs
Robyn

Pennys from Heaven said...

Hello Merle!!

Long time since I have been visiting the blogs....night classes have been overwhelming with homework...but I just got my last big paper wrote for this term...HURRAY!!

Glad to hear your visit to the Dr. went well!!

Later
Peg

Jon Cox said...

Hey Hey!!! :o) I'm so very sorry I haven't stopped by in a while. :o( Hahahaha! I love your twists on words as well as the teapot joke! WONDERFUL work my friend! :o)

mreddie said...

So glad all is well with the check-up. That is a long way on a motorcycle, no matter how young a person is. ec

Jen3 @ Amazing Triplets said...

Hello Merle! I'm so glad to hear that everything went well with your checkup. Your son's trip sounds wonderful & your stories for the day are great!!

Granny said...

Glad all is well with you. Funny about the teapot.

Ken Ferguson said...

Hello Merle, ken Ferguson.
Thank you for your kind words. It's no mean feat but I'm getting there. Just takes time.
Take care....Ken

Jeanette said...

HI Merle
Pleased to hear your blood tests and Doctors visit went well.
Love the teapot joke and your finishing words ..
Take Care Janxxx

Mom Called Me Sadie said...

I love visiting you. You're always so upbeat and I have such a good time. Its just like I sit down with you and have a nice cup of tea and conversation.

Glad you're doing well! Thanks for having me over!

JunieRose2005 said...

Glad your doctor's visit went well.

and , as always, your post cheered me!


Junie

Raggedy said...

Very good post!
hahaha at jokes...
hugs