Thursday, August 03, 2006

This and That.

Hello My Friends ~~ Well I am about to type out my post, but

where we go from there is anybody ’s guess. Blogger is being

most unkind, as I cannot open anything at present, including

my own blog, and most of yours. If I did get them open earlier

I could not open comments. So I will say Thank you to those

who left comments here for today as they are very much

appreciated. Now to find something nice to post….

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<><><> The Average Man’s Prayer. <><><>

Lord, I speak not in scholarly language,

But somehow, I know You wont care;

For mine is a humble petition…

Mine is the average man’s prayer.

<><><>

My thoughts are, of course, not brilliant,

My wishes, You know them quite well.

There are many of me and my fellows,

So many, it’s needless to tell.

<><><>

You know that I am one of those pluggers,

I go out each day and I fight;

And sometimes I’m beaten, discouraged,

And I’m very weary at night.

<><><>

I bark at my wife, who is patient,

I bully my children, who cry.

I know I could be better natured,

But often, I don’t even try.

<><><>

But You know how rough things are running,

How business is all in a hole,

A man’s got to sweat for his living

And struggle with body and soul.

<><><>

Lord, help me face life with courage,

And bless everything that I do.

I’m dumb when it comes to this praying,

But I trust and rely on You.

<><><>

Watch over the days of my dear ones---

They’re all that I have to share…….

And I wish I could make this more lofty,

But it’s only the average man’s prayer.

<><><><><><><>

<><><> Fun Time Folks <><><>

Mick was in court charged with double murder.

“You are charged with beating your wife to death with a

spanner,” the judge said.

A voice from the back of the court yelled, “You mongrel.”

The judge continued, “You are also charged with beating her

lover to death with a spanner.”

Again the voice at the back of the court yelled,”You mongrel.”

The judge stopped, looked at the man at the back and said,

“Paddy, I can understand your anger and frustration, but I will

not have any more of these outbursts or I will charge you with

contempt. Now, what is your problem?”

Paddy stood up, fuming: “For 15 years I lived next door to that

mongrel, and every time I asked to borrow a spanner, he said

he didn’t have one.”

<><><><><><>

Two turtles go camping and pack a portable cooler with sandwiches

and beer. After three days of walking, they arrive at a great spot,

but realise they ’ve forgotten the bottle opener

The first turtle turns to the second and says, “You’ve gotta go

back and get the opener or else we have no beer.”

<><><><>

“No way,” says the second. “By the time I get back, you will have

eaten all the food.”

“I promise I won’t,” says the turtle. “Just hurry!”

Nine full days pass and there’s still no sign of the second turtle

<><><><>

Exasperated and starving, the first turtle digs into the sandwiches.

Suddenly, the second turtle pops out from behind a rock and yells:

“I knew it. I’m not bloody well going now!!”

<><><><><><><

Last time I saw that joke they weren’t turtles as I remember.

And from my calender ------

Just in time, sweltering summer gives way to brisk autumn.

Each of life’s seasons can bring welcome change.

<><><><>

Happines – consists in giving and in serving others.

Henry Drummond.

<><><><>

Happiness may be a warm puppy, but joy is having a good friend

to share your life with.

<><><><>

A rich person has many treasures, a wise person treasures

many friendships.

<><><><>

The opportunity to experience joy is always only a smile away.

<><><> That’s it, now if blogger is co-operative ---

Take care my friends till we meet again, Merle. <><><>

15 comments:

Puss-in-Boots said...

Hello Merle, I've just come over from Pea's place and enjoyed reading your post. Thanks for the jokes, two I haven't heard before, so I can pinch them to tell at work! lol. "The Average Man's Prayer" is sure something I can relate to.

I shall come and visit you again :-)

Tammy said...

we are praying for summer to give way to fall here in the US that is for sure...I just feel so sorry for those that are suffering in this heat!!

Janice said...

Hi Merle,

Nice turtle joke, and your posting as usual are up lifting.

Janice~

somershade said...

Enjoyed your post today,missed reading them.I still have'nt got to post yet,but will soon.xxxooo

Jeanette said...

Hi Merle
great jokes as usual enjoyed fun time and all your little sayings Take Care Hugs xxxx

Sue said...

Your everyman's prayer is wonderful. We enjoyed the turtle joke! We need to ask, "what is a spanner?"
Enjoy your day, Merle :-)

PEA said...

Good afternoon Merle:-) Isn't Blogger being a big headache lately, hopefully they'll get their act together soon!! Loved the prayer, jokes and sayings...you always make my day! Hugs xoxo Oh, and as Sue asked, what is a spanner?? Never heard of that before either!

JunieRose2005 said...

I liked that first part- the prayer!

It's always good to visit you here.

June

Lisa said...

Hi there, this is not my 1st time to your blog, but my 1st time posting. I just wanted to let you know that I enjoy what you write. And I especially love the jokes you provide. They make me laugh! Have a great week

HORIZON said...

lol on the turtle joke Merle! They sound just like my older kids- teenagers- who needs em-lol. Just as quick to do things yourself. :) Ok- l really do love them but sometimes even l need the break. :)
Take care in AU.

mreddie said...

Thankfully I seldom have blogging trouble, maybe you should threaten it with a couple of spanners. :) ec

Kathy said...

Guys a spanner is an Aussie term. Guess you would call it a ( crescent) wrench.
Enjoy the jokes Merle. Keep 'em comin' cheers

Kerri said...

Hi Merle,
Thanks for visiting my blog and leaving such nice comments. I loved the spanner and turtle jokes :) I immediately thought about the word 'spanner' being a mystery to U.S. folks. It's not a term they use over here.
The Average Man's Prayer is wonderful!
Thank you!

Granny said...

Some people call it a spanner here as well. Either way, it could do a lot of damage.

Raggedy said...

I enjoyed your post!
Thanks!
Hugs