Hi Everyone ~~ Well my weekend is over as it’s Sunday
evening and it has been quite a nice couple of days. BUT
My football team, Carlton could not win - AGAIN !!
Thank Goodness there is more to life than football, but
it is a major source of entertainment. And disappointment.
There is always next year !!
<><><> A story tonight called A Terrible Moment. <><><>
Her hair was in wild disorder. Her face was flushed, and her eyes flashing. She clenched and unclenched her fingers in
an agony of despair.
Unless her looks belied her, she was a deeply injured and
desperate woman. Her indignation and anger were allied with
“Cruel one; oh cruel one,” she cried, in anguished tones.
“I have borne with you too long ! You have injured me, you
have tortured me, and yet I could not bear to give you up.
When first we met,” she continued, “how your ease and
polish attracted me ! When you became my very own, how
my friends envied me ! But your understanding is too small
for my large soul. You have ruined my standing in society.
If we had never met, I might have walked in peace. So now
begone ! We part for ever ! ”
There came a moment’s compulsive breathing, a gritting of
teeth and a sharp cry. It was all over. By an almost super-
human effort, she had pulled off her new shoes.
<><><> Indeed – A Terrible Moment. <><><>
Ever bought a new product and couldn’t quite understand
what all the advertising terms meant. We are here to help.
NEW – Different color from previous design
ALL NEW – Parts not interchangeable with previous design.
ADVANCED DESIGN – The advertising agency doesn’t
EXCLUSIVE – Imported Product.
UNMATCHED – Almost as good as the competition.
FOOLPROOF OPERATION – No provision for adjustments.
IT’S HERE AT LAST – Rush job. Nobody knew it was coming.
FIELD TESTED –Manufacturer lacks test equipment.
HIGH ACCURACY – Unit on which all parts fit.
FUTURISTIC – No other reason why it looks the way it does
REDESIGNED – Previous flaws fixed – we hope.
DIRECT SALES ONLY – Factory had a big argument with
YEARS OF DEVELOPMENT – We finally got one to work.
BREAKTHROUGH – We finally figured out a use for it.
MAINTENANCE FREE – Impossible to fix.
MEETS ALL STANDARDS = Ours, not yours.
SOLID STATE – Heavy as anything.
HIGH RELIABILITY – We made it work long enough to ship it.
<><><> 10 Chocolate Rules. <><><>
1. If you’ve got chocolate on your hands, you’re eating it
2. Chocolate covered sultanas, cherries, orange slices and
strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as many as you want.
3. The problem: How to get 2 blocks of chacolate home from
the shop in a hot car. Solution: Eat it in the car park.
4. Diet Tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal. It will take
the edge off your appetite and you’ll eat less.
5. If calories are an issue, store your chocolates on top of
the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights and they will
jump out to protect themselves.
6. If I eat equal amounts of dark chocolate and white
chocolate. This equates to a balanced diet.
7. Money talks. Chocolate sings.
8. Chocolates have many preservatives. Preservatives make
you look younger.
9. Question: Why is there no such organization as Chocolates
Anonymous? Answer. Because no one wants to quit.
10. Put “eat chocolate” at the top of your list of things to do.
That way, at least you’ll get one thing done.
<><><> And lastly a quote …. <><><>
Women and cats will do as they please and men and dogs should
relax and get used to the idea !!!
<><> That is it Folks. I’ll be back, Merle. <><>