Sunday, August 06, 2006

The Shape I'm In.

Howdy my Friends ~~ I hope you have had a great weekend. It has been quite nice here, even signs that winter is on it’s way out. I spent some time today cooking as usual but if I want to eat, I have to keep doing that.

I spoke to all four of my kids by phone over the weekend, and all is well with them all.

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<><> I have a Poem tonight called “The Shape I’m In.” <><>

There’s nothing the matter with me;

I’m just as healthy as I can be;

I have arthritis in both my knees

And when I talk, I speak with a wheeze.

My pulse is weak and my blood is thin

But I’m awfully well for the shape I’m in

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I think my liver is out of whack;

I have a terrible pain in my back;

My hearing is poor and my eyes are dim;

Most everything seems to be out of trim.

I’m likely to fall most of the time;

But, all things considered, I’m feeling fine.

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Arch supports for both my feet,

Or I wouldn’t be able to walk down the street;

My fingers are painfully stiff in the joints

And my nails are too brittle to keep in points.

Complexion is bad, due to dry skin,

But I’m awfully well for the shape I’m in.

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Dentures upset me, I’m restless at night,

And in the morning I’m a real sight…….

Memory ’s failing, head’s in a spin,

I’m practically living on aspirin,

But I’m awfully well for the shape I’m in.

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Now – the moral is, as this tale we unfold,

That for you and me, who are growing old,

Lots better to say, “I’m fine” with a grin,

Than to tell everyone….the shape we are in.

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<><><><> What Women Want <><><><>

FINE - This is the word women use to end an

argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

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FIVE MINUTES – If she is getting dressed, this ½ an hour.

Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given 5

more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

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NOTHING – This is the calm before the storm. This means

“something” and you should be on your toes. Arguments that

begin with “nothing” usually end up in “fine.”

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GO AHEAD – This is a dare, not permission, DON’T DO IT !!

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LOUD SIGH - Although not actually a word, the loud sigh is

often misunderstood by men. A “Loud Sigh” means she thinks

you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time

standing here and arguing with you over “nothing.”

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THAT’S OKAY – This is one of the most dangerous statements

that woman can make to a man. “That’s Okay” means that she

wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you

will pay for your mistake.

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THANKS- This is the least used of all words in the female

vocabulary. If a woman is thanking you, do not question it,

just say you’re welcome and back out of the room slowly..

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IT’S YOUR CALL !!

This morning when the Lord opened a window to Heaven,

He saw me, and He asked: “My child, what is your greatest

wish for today?”

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I responded: ”Lord, please take care of the person who is

reading this message, their family and their special friends.

They deserve it and I love them very much.”

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The love of God is like the ocean, you can see it’s beginning

but not it’s end.

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“I can do all things in Him who strengthens me.”

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The jokes I looked at did not seem appropriate for Sunday,

so I will post them through the week. Stay tuned !! Some

calender thoughts, before I close. Stay happy everyone, Merle.

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He has achieved success who has lived well, laughed often, and

loved much. __Bessie Anderson Stanley.

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The bittersweet blooms of fall – may their beauty and fragrance

enhance your home throughout the coming Winter.

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The days shorten, granting the stars more time to shine.

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As naturally as the earth flows through the seasons, we

should flow through the seasons of life.

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13 comments:

Granny said...

Very nice.

Connie and Rob said...

Such a wonderful post. I can't wait to print it out and take it over to read it to my dad. He needs a smile or two.

Take care and come visit me some time.
Connie

Tammy said...

Hubby standing behind me reading this post...he could really identify with all the womanly sayings...lol!
We love your blog Merle...keep up the good work!
:-D

Jeanette said...

HI Merle
ty for all your comments on our holiday I had a wonderfull time showing Joanne the sights of Darwin.

Another great post. The shape im in, love all the small verses.my footy team lost .Go Tigers!!!
Take Care Hugs xxx

JunieRose2005 said...

Merle,


You always fine the nicest thngs to print here!

Thanks!

June

PEA said...

Your blog is always such a pleasure to read and it never fails to give me a few giggles:-) Poor men, they still haven't figured out how to handle us, eh? lol Loved everything you posted today!! Hugs xoxo

wolfbaby said...

that poem is cute

and the list is funny:)

thank you for a good luagh...

winter.. ohh how i dream of winter!!!

Raggedy said...

Another great post!
I am so glad I connected with you.
I can't tell you how much visiting here means to me.
Thank You!
Have a wonderful day!
*^_^
(=':'=) hugs
(")_ (")Š from da Raggedy one

Puss-in-Boots said...

Aaah, you're a wise lady Merle. Love your post with all the little bits and pieces.

Hope you had a great weekend. Take care.

Sue said...

Hi Merle,
We had a chuckle over your things that women say! We especially loved the quote “I can do all things in Him who strengthens me.”
Thanks for a great post :-)

Sometimes Saintly Nick said...

"THe Shape I'm IN" tells it like it is.

Margaret said...

Hello Merle, thank you for the welcome, I am flying by the seat of my pants.

Raggedy said...

I left a wish for you at my place.
Have a wonderful day!
*^_^
(=':'=) hugs
(")_ (")Š from da Raggedy one