Monday, July 03, 2006

Ten Commandments.

Hi There, People ~~ I hope that all is well with you all.

I spoke to Kathy this evening and she had just returned from

theatre, so she has had her skin graft and just has to get

well from here. A few more days in hospital should do it for her.

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I would like to get in early and wish everyone in the U.S. a very

happy Independencene Day on the 4th July.

I have to ring a cousin of mine tomorrow for his birthday, as he

was born on the 4th July, a real live nephew of OUR Uncle Sam.

Yes we had a wonderful uncle named Sam, who is no longer with us.

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I have quite a good article tonight, sent by my friend Warren.

He really is my brother, Peter’s friend and lives in Queensland.

I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. Thanks Warren.

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<><><> THE TEN COMMANDMENTS <><><>

<><><> BUY TEN AND GET ONE FREE <><><>

Commandment 1. Marriages are made in heaven. But so are thunder and lightning.

Commandment 2. If you want your wife to listen and pay strict attention to every

word you say, talk in your sleep.

Commandment 3. Marriage is grand - and divorce is around 100 grand!

Commandment 4. Married life is very frustrating. In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.

Commandment 5. When a man opens the door of his car for his wife you can be certain of

two possible reasons - either the car is new or the wife is.

Commandment 6. Marriage is when a man and woman become as one. The trouble starts

when they try to decide which one.

Commandment 7. Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something

you say. After marriage, he will fall asleep before you finish.

Commandment 8. Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and

a good cook. But the law allows only one wife.

Commandment 9. Marriage and love are purely matter of chemistry. Which is why wives treat

husbands like toxic waste?

Commandment 10. A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.

Bonus (11th) Commandment story. A long married couple came upon a wishing well. The wife leaned over, made

a wish and threw in a penny. The husband decided to make a wish too. But he leaned over too far, fell into the well, and drowned. The wife was stunned for a moment but then smiled, "Wow! This stuff really works!"

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A teacher asked her class, “What do you want out of life?”

A little girl in the back row raised her hand and said, “all I

want out of life is four little animals, just like my Mom always says”.

The teacher asked, “Really and what four little animals would that be?”

The little girl said, “A mink for my back, a jaguar in the garage

a tiger in the bed and a jackass to pay for all of it.”

The teacher fainted.

<><> I Will Not Worry <><>

I will not worry, I will trust,

God knows I am a child of dust;

I will not worry, I will hope

Perhaps upon some sunny slope

The flowers are waiting for me there,

While here the hills are blank and bare.

I will not worry, I will pray,

I know God cares for me today;

And trusting ever in his love,

I’ll tread the path that leads above.

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“Better a morsel of dry bread and peace- than a house full of banqueting and quarrels". Proverbs Ch.17. v1.

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Well that’s enough for now. I plan to post a Bible Quiz next.

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18 comments:

Tammy said...

Loved the 10 commandments of marriage...lmbo!!!
Your whole post was very good...you have a great day Merle!!!
:-D

Pennys from Heaven said...

Good Morning Merle!! Well, it's morning here, and we had to take a mandatory day off from work so everyone had a long weekend. Thanks for the Well wishes for a Happy Fourth in the U.S.A.

I loved your poem about "not to worry"....always good reminders for me the PRO-Worrier LOL.

Take care, and have an awesome day...
Peg

PEA said...

LOL loved the commandment one and also the others...your posts always brings smiles to my face:-) Hope your 4th of July is a fun one and I will be thinking of all my American friends that day:-)

Sue said...

Hi Merle,
Loved the Proverbs verse...
The blonde brownies are good. Hope you enjoy them too...

Lucy Stern said...

I'm glad Cathy is doing well. Interesting 10 commandments.

JunieRose2005 said...

:) I loved the 10 commandments, too!

June

bornfool said...

I liked the four animals joke. lol. Can't wait for the bible quiz. :)

rhapsody said...

Love the ten commandments & teacher story-

& poem & proverb...

Looking forward to your Bible Quiz-

& the very best to Kathy!

Granny said...

Hi. Good as usual. Bible post? I'll try.

Tammy said...

Hi...visiting for the first time...after visiting Sue for the first time...

Anyway, I really enjoyed reading your blog! I'm not sure of your age, but my mom is nearing 80 and has just started a blog about the same time as I did...just weeks ago. I love hearing the wisdom of those that have lived a little longer...and it's also facinating to read from someone who is from Australia!

I will be back...
God bless,
~Tammy

Hale McKay said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Hale McKay said...

Glad to hear Kathy is doing well. The 10 Commandments were great.

Keep forgetting about you until I see your comments on someones blogs. Going to fix that today and add you to my Blogroll where you should have been all along.

Ava said...

Glad to hear that Kathy is recovering and had her skin graft.

Much 4th of July celebrating going on ... lots of fireworks.

Ava

mreddie said...

So glad Kathy seems to be coming along. Your cousin that was born on July 4th - is he an independent sort? :) "I will not worry" is a very good one - we should all put its words into practice. ec

Michelle said...

Hey Merle, so glad Kathy is on the mend :o)

Loved the proverbs! Stay warm :o)

Jeanette said...

Hi Merle
Great post Like the 10 commandments and the teacher passing out.
Its Alans Birthday today 4july .
We had some lovely Trips going up the centre to Darwin also 2 trips through outback QLD.to Darwin.so still got more photo's to post .Also a few to QLD/S.A.
Take Care ....... Janxxxxxxxxx

Raggedy said...

Great post. I have the same funny that you named commandments, it was sent to me as a list joke. It is a good one.
Happy Birthday to your 4th of July cousin. Any baby born here on the 4th gets called a firecracker..lol
I am glad Kathy is on the mend.
Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.
Thank you for wishing us well on our 4th.
*^_^
(=':'=) meow hugs
(")_ (")Š from da Raggedy one
*

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