Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Time and Money

Hello to you all and thanks for your comments. I have been

unable to get on the Net tonight, but after about 4 hours

we are back on the air. Anyway, I caught up on reading the

papers and even wrote a couple of letters, longhand, which

I do not do very often. Thank goodness.

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I hope all is well with you and anyone sick will hopefully be a

lot better very soon.

Tomorrow the 21st my nephew Marcus from Holt Press will

turn 45 years of age. So Happy Birthday Marcus. You are

starting to get some big numbers there!! Hope you have a great day,

lots of prezzies and good food, and getting some special attention

from the family.

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A Poem ….. Time is the Hunter

Time is the hunter, we are it’s prey,

As we pass each hour of every day,

We are not aware, until it’s too late,

What we take for granted, will seal our fate.

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Time gives so favour, hears no cry,

Of the honest truth or the blatant lie,

For in the end, what games we play,

Time will have the final say.

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What time we have, is ours to keep,

A gift on loan, while awake or sleep,

To spend as we wish, our distance run,

When our time is up, our time has come.

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<><><><><> Time for a Joke. <><><><><>

A married couple went to have their baby delivered. Upon

their arrival, the doctor said he had invented a machine that

would transfer a portion of the mother’s labour pain to the

baby ‘s father.

He asked if they were willing to try it out. They were both

very much in favour of it. The doctor set the pain transfer

to 10% for starters, explaining that even 10% was probably

more pain than the father had ever experienced before.

However as the labour progressed, the husband felt fine and

asked the doctor to go ahead and kick it up a notch, so the

doctor adjusted the machine to 20% pain transfer.

The husband was still feeling fine.

The doctor checked the husband’s blood pressure and was

amazed at how well he was doing, At this point, they decided

to try for 50%. The husband continued to feel quite well.

Since the pain transfer was obviously helping out the wife

considerably, the husband encouraged the doctor to transfer

ALL the pain to him. The wife delivered a healthy baby with

virtually no pain, She and her husband were ecstatic.

When they got home, the postman was dead on the porch.

<><><><><><> Thoughts on Money <><><><><><>

It can buy a House, But not a Home.

It can buy a Bed, But not Sleep.

It can buy a clock, But not Time.

It can buy a Book, But not Knowledge.

It can buy a Position, But not Respect.

It can buy Medicine, But not Health.

It can buy Blood, But not Life.

It can buy Sex, But not Love.

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Money isn’t everything, and it often causes pain and

suffering. I tell you all this because I am your

Friend, and as your Friend I want to take away your

pain and suffering……

So send me all your money and I will suffer for you.

I Accept Cash, Money Orders, Personal cheques, Bags of

Gold . Note: No children as Payments, They will be returned.

<><><><> A Quickie to Finish. <><><><>

A Police Recruit was asked: “What would you do if you had to

arrest your own mother?”

The Recruit answered: “Call for backup.” Bye for now, Merle.

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13 comments:

bornfool said...

Funny stuff. Poor postman. lol

Granny said...

That first one is so funny.

Ava said...

You wrote a letter long hand??? Wow!

Did you know that it's actually considered a national crisis that people don't know how to write with pens and pencils in neat handwriting anymore? Everyone types on the computer and prints it out. It showed adult hand writing versus kids in school today ... wow! There is some terrible hand writing out there! I remember what a big deal it was when I was in school. The neatness of our handwriting was even part of our grade. What happened?

Ava

Susie said...

Hi Merle,
I came here via Ann. I have also "seen"
you on Sandy's site (AIP). I enjoyed my visit here and I'll be back later to read a bit more about you. Stop by and visit me if you'd like :-)
Sue

LZ Blogger said...

Sorry about the PC / blog problems. Thanks for letting me know about Marcus' 45th. b-day! I'll pop by and wish him well. ~ jb///

kenju said...

Hi, Merle. Good jokes, I missed you while I was gone.

mreddie said...

Writing a letter by hand would be very odd - I used to dislike doing that because I am such a perfectionist and had to rewrite them so many times. They would even be hard to mail with the postman dead and all. :) ec

DellaB said...

thanks yet again Merle.. you have the FUNNIEST jokes. here's a quickie:
"2 blondes walked into a building - you'da thought one of them would have seen it!"

thanks for the headsup, I'm off to say happy birthday to Marcus.

Roshanthi said...

I really the poem about time. It's so true, you've just got to live life to the fullest while you've got it.

While money can't buy knowledge, you really need loadz of it for postgratuate studies... These day's that's the main barrier btwn me and my Cambridge MBA! :0)

Donna~K said...

Those were some funny jokes! lol Hope you have a great week. Hugs! :)

Peter said...

Hi Merle, that was a nice thought to post about Marcus' birthday, thanks.

Val said...

I LOVED the joke with the dead postman in it. Laughed out loud, the kids probably thought, Oh no, there's Mom laughing at her blogs again.

Using pens and pencils is definitely on the decline, and they don't know how to write cursive, even though they were taught in school. Even us oldies who have many years' experience writing are falling into bad handwriting habits. It's the computers' fault.

Michelle said...

LOL, i'd need back up too if i had to arresst my mother!! Fun jokes Merle :o)